Today I would like to talk about the increase in the number of violent acts being perpertrated against women of late. This week alone I have read of a man in Cairns who has been convicted of murdering his partner and her 14 year old Daughter all because he perceived that he no longer had control over her.
It seems She had seen the light and she wanted to end the relationship. Highlighted in the world news this week the story of a brave lady from England who had both eyes gouged out by a jealous partner and now has to live with this for the rest of her life, because She did not leave at the first sign of violence. To her credit she is trying to help others in the same situation.
I am an avid watcher of the crime channel and the number of cases where the husband has murdered the Wife to avoid getting a Divorce or because a violent argument got out of hand are very common. The main reason I am writing this Blog is in the vain hope that just one Women will read it and wake up to the fact that it is not your fault. So you may have made them angry but no matter what the cause of an argument, it does not give anyone the right to make it Physical. Everytime they appologise and say they will never do it again and you believe them, Just remember that all these other Women thought the same thing and look where it got them. A Man that uses intimidation or violence against women does not stop they will always do it. For many of them it is learned behaviour from experiences growing up often with an abusive parent. You must ask yourself is this the message I want my Children to have.
As a survivor of an abusive relationship I can say that yes it is easy to say all this with hindsight however if someone had tried to tell me any of this while I was in that relationship I would never have listened as I thought that it would stop with time. After one of these violent and nasty episodes things would be so nice for a few days until the next one. It took 17 years to finally come to terms with the fact things were never going to change.
In my next blog I will talk about things you can do if you decide to get out.